Last night was mad real! But before I get into the action of last night let me back track and say “going out” has no good or bad with it.. comes down to intent behind it.
Back in college I was going out with the intention of finding women to have sex with and just boost my ego by getting numbers. Having sex with them was more to brag to my friends and have a wild story to tell…
Judge me if you must but just know I am here to be vulnerable and give you a inside look into my thought processes and allow my life to help you see others in a new perspective…
I don’t care if you judge me but I know the right person will hear this and get what they need to push thru whatever is going on in their lives.
Where was I… so there I was doing some work on Pasha’s new book when I got a call from Bagback Jeff to see If I would like to go out with him and few friends.
I am every detailed so I need to know everything! Time, location, cost, what to wear, with who, why are we going out, what do this people look like, and what are their social security… I do some research on people before I chill with them if I know their name.
I am big on doing some civil reconnaissance on the people I hangout with… To know the type of person you are. So I checked google, Facebook, Instagram, and even my contacts at the CIA give me a breakdown about you. I got friends in high places. (wink, wink)
However, I was already going to say yes because I needed to some time to disconnect from grueling online work and meet new real people instead of click to become friends…
I met up with Jeff and Orville The Poet. We went to a Jamaican spot in D.C on 6th Street or 16th Street… I believe but overall it was dope. We were one of the first people in the club and it was packed quickly!
I had fun and because I was out just to connect with Jeff and new people. I just danced alone all night and it was cool to not have this pressure of trying to get a girl to dance with me or get some phone numbers.
We met up with some of Jeff’s other friends and I met this girl that I was highly interested in. (wink, wink)
However, I didn’t ask her for her number. Call it fear of rejection but she looked good but her personality though and her mental was sexy. She wants to get her Ph.D and I love it. She is a home body just like me too and I can’t help but appreciate her open personality and smile.
I don’t believe in love at 1st sight anymore…. I believe love is built up over time. You start with lust, attractive, like, and then fight, overcome, more lust, and marriage, and then a lot of sex, and a lot more fighting and then love finds it way overtime.
I do believe if I see her again and she is single then I will ask her out to coffee or a park walk. 1st dates should be open environments and not just weird sit down across the table .. where you ask each other to recite your whole life story.
So back to this girl… If I see her again I will ask her out but if not then life goes on so I’m good… (Did I miss my soul mate?)
The biggest thing about the club was looking at other men and seeing myself in them. Some scared to dance and so they hold up the wall all night. Some boldly getting rejected and just trying to find whomever will dance with them.
Let me clear, I have never cursed out or backlashed on a girl for rejecting me… That is corny and childish to me. If you are a man that does that please STOP IT NOW!
The biggest thing is seeing the need for validation from men and women. The reason I see it is because I have battled it and able to win against it.
The need to show you are top dog to strangers… I can’t explain it but I can see it.
The biggest revelation that hit me was self-love is not found in the arms of strangers in your bed or strangers you meet out in the club (Well it happens rarely). It is found in loving and accepting yourself...Click To Tweet
Going out you dressed up to be attractive and decent looking. But you want to look good as well and attract the right people…
But when you are comfortable with yourself you put off a different energy than when you are seeking validation or a confirmation that you do look good…
It is almost real life social media of “like” my pictures and give me social validation in my veins please…
With all that being said. Learn to love you and accept yourself. If you need help with it then please apply to work with myself and my team below
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